Gaming News I Care About

"This is Earthend!"

Patapon 2 hits stores on May 5th. Bizarrely, Sony will be releasing it as DLC-only ($20). Even more bizarrely, you will still be able to go to Best Buy and buy the box. The box will include an instruction booklet and a download voucher. I can only assume this means Patapon 2 will not be an enormous game, space-wise. I'm very excited, for two reasons. First, Patapon may be my favorite PSP game, and one of most artistically brilliant games to hit any console ever. Second, it'll be the first time I've switched my PSP on in months. Sony just doesn't know how to support that machine. That's not all, though. Sony is rumored to be getting a real PSP sequel ready for release (PSP "Go!") that will lack a UMD slot entirely. The plan here, allegedly, is that Sony will begin releasing the most popular PSP games on the PSN. We're gonna need a bigger Memory Stick Duo...I'll probably learn more at E3 (I'm going to E3 this year).

Look, it's Mr. Fat!

I love my DSi. I really do, but I wish Nintendo would support it. The only notable DS release in the past...well, as long as I can remember...has been Pokemon Diamond, and it was released a few weeks before the DSi. I'd like those DSi-enhanced games Nintendo promised to come out sooner rather than later. Another point of contention: the DSiWare released so far has sucked. Tech demos and terrible "minigames" that they can't bring themselves to charge more than $5 for (and honestly, that's too much). Japan is getting a real DSi Virtual Console with classic GB/A games. Bring that over here, Nintendo of America! Don't sit on your damn duffs! Get with the program and remind me why the DSi is so awesome!

This is what happens when worlds collide!

Break out the champaigne bottles: Marvel vs. Capcom 2 is coming to the PSN and Xbox Live. IT will come "unlocked," with all 50+ characters available from the get-go. This is one of the most celebrated 2D fighters of all time, and I'm very excited about this. It's the superior Dreamcast code that's being ported over, with some interesting graphical improvements to compensate for the HD age. Players will have the option of playing with the original pixels, smoothed pixels, or yet smoother pixels. The game will not be coming to the Wii because of file size limitations. The game will cost $15 (must want), include a few different online modes, and support widescreen displays. I generally suck at 2D fighters (see Street Fighter, King of Fighters, and King of the Monsters) but as I recall, this one was pretty kickass.

All your Wesker are belong to us.

I'm still playing RE5--I just can't stop. In fact, I feel guilty for not playing my other games, like Bioshock and LittleBigPlanet. But here's the thing: I fucking love RE5. As if the main campaign doesn't provide enough excitement and replayability (Professional difficulty is a bitch), the online Versus mode is just as fun. It's basically Mercenaries with up to three other people, all competing for points. The only thing that drags Versus down is that you will sometimes end up playing with people in a game in Slayers (kill the zombies) who think they're playing Survivors (kill each other). So you're busy creating an awesome chain of zombie kills and suddenly some deuchbag comes up and starts shooting you in the back. What the fuck, man?! Kill zombies like you're supposed to! I really need to dig my headset out and start cursing these idiots during gameplay. Although I doubt they're going to stop. Then, if you kill them for being a cock, their mission in life becomes vengeance. God, I hate those morons. But when you get a group of good-natured people in a game, it's a great time!

If any of you readers out there want to join me for a rousing round of zombie-killin', my PSN handle is "Sillysaur." We shall battle together...for great justice!